In the month of May I have featured motherhood-inspired posts and today we will gain insight into the life of a single mom. You will meet Sierra and learn what she does to manage it all and stay encouraged as a single mom to her five-year-old son.
Tell us about yourself and your child.
My name is Sierra and I’m 27 yrs old. I enjoy hiking, breakfast potatoes with sour cream, serving my community in any way possible, and traveling. My son’s name is Randall, he is 5 yrs old. He enjoys YouTube, video games, jumping on the trampoline in our backyard, and watching family movies with me.
What do you do for a living?
Currently, I am a full time student completing my B.A. in Communications. Before the pandemic I was a community outreach coordinator for a managed care organization.
How do you fit in time for school?
While Randall attends school in person for half of the day, I try to finish at least one class load of assignments before he gets back home. If I don’t finish I wait until he is asleep or doing an independent activity.
How long have you been a single mom?
I have been a single mom since Randall was 6 months old.
Is your child’s father involved? How does co-parenting look?
Randall’s father is involved in his life. We live 5 hours away from his father. Co-parenting is a continued learning experience for both parties. We do have a system that seems to work for us now. Randall visits his father once a month for a weekend. During the summer he spends about 2 weeks with his father.
Describe the best part of being a single mom.
The best part about being a single mother is when Randall visits his father and I get a break! I know this sounds bad but every mother needs a break. I enjoy the motherhood moments as well, but that break allows me to spend time with me again.
Share the hardest part of being a single mom.
The hardest part of being a single mother is feeling like I can’t make any mistakes with raising Randall. Being the primary provider for Randall is a huge responsibility and I want to be the best mother I know how to be. Not having a partner to lean on is the hardest part of being a single mother.
Walk us through your typical day.
7:00 am – 8:00 am Wake up and get Randall ready for school
8:00 – 9:00 am Drop Randall off at school, visit Panera Bread for a green tea treat, head back home and eat breakfast, get dressed for the gym
9:00 – 10:00 am Gym time or complete school work *depends on how much school work I have to complete if I go to the gym
10:00 – 11:45 am Go back home, shower, and wait in parent pick up line for Randall to get out of school
11:45 – 12:45 pm Get Randall back home, prepare lunch
12:45 – 3:45 pm Do afternoon activity, go on a walk on SIU campus, maybe walk around the neighborhood, Randall may go into an independent activity which will allow me to do school work
4:00 – 5:00 pm Start preparing dinner
5:00 – 6:00 pm Eat dinner, clean kitchen
6:00 – 7:45 pm Family time
7:45 – 8:30 pm Getting ready for bedtime, shower, clean room
8:30 – 10:00 pm Me time; watching a movie, completing homework, talking on the phone to my boo, scrolling on IG and FB etc.
How do you handle the day-to-day responsibilities of motherhood (cooking, cleaning, laundry, appointments, child’s schooling, etc.)?
For me, this part of motherhood isn’t hard, I just do what needs to be done. Some nights I may not feel like cooking, so yes, Randall has eaten McDonald’s for dinner before. Laundry, cleaning, and appointments all come with everyday life so I tackle them as they come.
Are you able to have an outlet or a support system to be vulnerable with?
YES! My support system is my best friend Deanna, my Carbondale best friend Carl, and my Granny. Without them I would be crazy!
Are you currently dating or in a relationship? And if so, how do you fit them into your life?
I am currently dating. I keep this part of my life separate from Randall. I’m very picky with who I allow around Randall. Once the person that I am dating becomes consistent in my life, I will introduce them to Randall. But for now, they work around my availability.
Do you desire to be married one day?
This is a tough question, for now I will say yes. But the compromises and changes are what scares me the most about marriage.
Do you ever feel lonely? If so, when and how do you handle it?
Of course, I have lonely moments. But I’m never alone for too long, I go find Randall and beg for hugs and cuddles! He is never too far either his room or the living room.
Do you miss anything about being in a relationship?
Wow, lol no I don’t miss anything about being in a relationship. I’m so used to dating now, I appreciate my space and time to be me. I’m honestly surprised by my answer.
Share one lesson you want your child to learn from your experience as a single mom.
Respect yourself enough to make whomever you impregnate your wife and team mate first! Life isn’t a fairytale so in case that doesn’t happen in that order be a responsible parent and share the responsibilities of raising your child equally. And ALWAYS respect your child’s mother. She gave you the greatest gift, life.
What is one piece of advice you’d like to share to encourage other single moms?
If you have trusted family or friends around you that wont mind babysitting, let them! You deserve a break! Also you’re not perfect, you are going to make mistakes, be easy on yourself. If your child notices your mistake just say, “hey mommie isn’t perfect and it’s okay we can fix it together.” Lastly, take weekend road trips with your kids, they will remember and love it! Kids love adventures and sometimes a change of scenery is healthy for all people involved, big and small.
Thank you Sierra for sharing a peek into your motherhood journey with Randall! I really appreciate you taking the time to share and encourage other single moms following the blog! My favorite part was your advice to make sure you take time to take care of yourself as a mom.
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Are you a single mother? Can you relate to Sierra and her journey in motherhood as a single mom? Share with us below.