This is the story of how a first-time mom who read the books and watched all of the natural birth stories on YouTube gave birth in a military hospital in Alaska.
I am a pretty young mom. Married my senior year prom date at 21, he joined the U.S. Army during my senior year of college, and soon after we were expecting our first child. At six months pregnant, I would find out that we were moving to Alaska for my husband’s first duty station. Alaska was over 3,000 miles from our home here in Indiana.
Though a delivery outside of a hospital terrified my own mother, it was something I wanted deep down inside. Natural and unmedicated birth with a doula and midwife. As you probably already know from the title of this blog post, that didn’t happen.
Our insurance covered birth and care at the hospital on base and we just didn’t know enough about the area or state of Alaska to feel comfortable birthing anywhere else.
Friday Night- October 16th, 2015
I’d felt a tightening in my abdomen for a few days now but I thought it was just the baby changing position since my due date wasn’t until October 31st. So, my husband and I went with his company for their bowling event on base. Yes, I was out there bowling at 38 weeks pregnant, and I had a blast. Maybe a little too much because when I went to the restroom, I lost my mucus plug.
They say when you lose your mucus plug, labor can happen as soon as the next day.
Saturday- October 17th, 2015
It was a normal Saturday and my husband and I went on a few walks to keep moving. I cooked a soup for dinner, we sat down to eat and watch tv when I heard a loud pop, felt my abdomen tighten, and felt a huge gush of warm liquid come from down under.
My water broke. It is now 8:23pm Alaska Standard Time.
After running to our bathroom and losing the rest of my mucus plug, I called my mother. I remember crying and saying “I’m not ready”. Once she calmed me down she told me to call the hospital because my water broke before active labor and it was important to go soon since I was losing amniotic fluid.
I called, took a quick shower, and we were there within an hour. Once we arrived at the hospital, the staff brought a wheelchair because labor and delivery were on the other side of the building. I kept asking to walk instead but they were admitted about me sitting to prevent a fall (which of course would be a liability).
Birth plan pivot number one.
Meeting the woman that would deliver my baby.
I felt it was important to build trust and connection with the person that would be delivering my child and ultimately caring for me too. However, as a military family, my doctor would be determined by which doctor was on call during the shift.
During my prenatall appointments, I mostly saw one person. When in the hospital bed, I was introduced to the woman, whom I’ve never met, that would bring my child earthside while keeping me alive.
Did you know that black women experience maternal mortality at a rate two to three times higher than white women? Here I was, a Black woman, giving birth for the first time in a room of complete strangers.
Birth plan pivot number two.
Natural and Unmedicated Birth Plan
I know that hospitals are necessary and vital for the community. However, I am uncomfortable in hospitals as I have only ever been to one in relation to sickness and death. A hospital is not the first place I think of when it comes to such a life-giving moment.
I planned to birth freely, without intervention, to trust my body and experience birth the way God designed it to be experienced, pain and all. This isn’t everyone’s view of birth, and that is okay. Every choice should be supported and respected.
Our Hospital Birth Began At Only 4cm Dilated
I was 4cm dilated. Routine procedures like IV hookups for hydration, a tube inserted into my vagina to keep fluid levels normal to protect my unborn child, and laying on my back and side with a monitor strapped around my abdomen to monitor the stress levels of my child with each contraction.
It was dark in the room, cold, and just not a comfy environment. I’d hoped to labor in the shower or on my medicine ball, but since contractions were happening too fast and too early, I had to stay connected to the monitor because the baby’s heart rate was dropping at each contraction.
The staff would rush in and flip and toss me around each time I had a contraction to help calm the baby. After four hours of this and laboring naturally, I heard the doctor warn the nurses about a possible c-section and calling to have a room prepped and the anesthesiologist ready.
These were the most discouraging words and I began to second guess my ability to continue unmedicated. Especially after learning, I was only 6cm dilated at this point. So I prayed, looked toward my husband who was by my side the entire time, and asked the doctor if she could call in the anesthesiologist to explain the procedure and risks involved.
I got an epidural.
Birth plan pivot numbers three through five.
October 18th, 2015- Sunday Morning Gabriella Was Born
Now past midnight and with the epidural, my body relaxed, my daughters heart rate was stable, and I was able to take a nap.
I could tell the epidural didn’t work on the right side of my body so I still felt much of the contractions and could move my leg. Both happy and disappointed I was surprised that after all of that the epidural wasn’t even working well. However, I did feel like I had some control over my body even if it was only on one side.
4:50 AM Alaskan Standard Time
It was time to push but I wasn’t out of the woods. My doctor told me I had to give it my all because Gabriella’s heart rate was dropping again. If I wasn’t able to have my daughter soon, I would be having a c-section.
Though I visioned a birth without intervention, with the help of a vacuum to assist in bringing her down, an episiotomy, and so much prayer, our daughter was born vaginally with nine mighty pushes. The cord was wrapped around her neck slightly but she was absolutely perfect.
Gabriella was born at 5:02 AM weighing 5lbs 14oz and 19in long.
Birth plan pivots six and seven.
The Hospital Birth That Gave Me Her
As new moms and repeat moms, we all have some sort of birth plan. It’s a big deal. Plans change, and sometimes you have to pivot.
If you desire to experience natural and unmedicated birth, most will tell you to stay out of the hospital. Honestly, I agree if you are low risk for complications. Research shows that unnecessary intervention is something you want to avoid as much as possible.
Yes, some would say if I weren’t at the hospital, I could have died or lost my baby. And that’s a real fear for some.
I am thankful I had such an amazing labor and delivery team that did everything they could to get me as close to a natural birth experience as possible. My doctor was a God sent. She was so patient with me and I believe that if I had a different doctor, the outcome would have been much different.
However, I also believe that when a mother is not comfortable, feels she has no control over her own experience and is in a physical environment that does not calm her, it affects the outcome of the labor and birthing process.
My breastfeeding journey and bonding experience did not get off to a great start because of so many interventions, protocols, and a lack of support and patience from staff. That’s hard to forgive because I’ll never get those moments back. Five years later and I am still seeing the effects of our hospital experience on my relationship with my beautiful daughter.
The Business of Being Born by Ricki Lake
I am an advocate of birth outside of the traditional hospital setting when mother and baby are low risk and have quick access to Certified Nurse-Midwives, an OBGYN, and/or an emergency room. As hard as it is for some to believe, I truly feel safer in my home, out on a field of wildflowers, or at a birthing center than I do in a hospital. To each their own.
There’s no doubt that there’s a place for c-sections and emergency medical interventions when it’s necessary. The issue I have is the fear-mongering surrounding birth. Birth is no longer seen as a normal biological process.
The Business of Being Born is such an eye-opening documentary into the business of hospital birth. If you feel a hospital birth is your preference, definitely seek a hospital birth. But if not, that is okay too.
The point is, no matter your plans, be willing to let go and let God. I safely delivered a beautiful baby girl and got to come home with her. I had the birth I was supposed to have despite the birth I wanted to have. Stay encouraged and educated. Knowledge is key. Learn how to avoid unnecessary labor interventions. So that no matter what, you’re able to ebb and flow with the experience.
COMMENT
Share your hospital birth experience. Was it positive? True to your birth plan? If it was traumatic, include a trigger warning but feel free to share because your experience deserves to be heard too.
Read all about my natural and unmedicated water birth at a free-standing birth center four years later.
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